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The Foundation of your Consulting Business

By crooky | December 28, 2007

I have heard the three pillar approach to growing a successful consulting practice: Professionalism, Marketing and Consistent Quality. I wouldn’t argue that these three pillars are not important but you cannot build the Colloseum on shifting sand. These pillars of your business must be supported by a stable base. Two conversations I had tonight drove this point home - the stable base of every successful consultant are stable relationships. I’m married with kids so my base is my wife and kids. If they’re off kilt, my business is off kilt. For consultants who aren’t married, your close social network takes the place of a wife and children. Even if you are married, that base of friends is vitally important. No one can build a successful consulting practice without loved ones to prop them up.

Case in point - tonight I was at the home of a friend and colleague that recently left a very lucrative job with a major multinational consulting firm. He was building an important international portfolio. He was bringing home six figures and the gig was a real feather in his cap. It came to a crashing halt when his wife found out that she had a brain tumour. It was then, when his family was in crisis that he realized how much he had been negleting his wife and three teenaged children. The work wasn’t worth it. By his own admission, his wife was close to leaving him when she got sick. Her illness was a wakeup call for him. He subsequently left the high profile consulting job and took a more modest job with a local startup that while challenging, has him home for dinner almost every night of the week. Tonight was the first time I’d met his family and they were absolutely lovely. He made an excellent decision by shifting his priorities to them.

My wife and I were discussing this situation in the car on the way home and the topic of my own work/life/sanity balance came up. My wife and I have been married for over five years and my business is almost exactly five years old. Essentially, I’ve been self-employed for the bulk of our marriage. Yet, we are still together and now we have two lovely children of our own to raise. Admittedly, I need to take better care of my health but my wife is of the opinion that I have done an excellent job keeping it all in balance and in her words “I would have left you years ago if you hadn’t kept it in balance. I can’t be a widow to your business.”

I can’t imagine how my life would have turned out if she’d left me and we both became single parents. My business, at the very least, would have suffered enormously. But why do I have this business? Partly, it’s a lifestyle business. It gives me the freedom to spend a Wednesday afternoon with my three year-old daughter or take a 20 minute break on a Friday morning to give my son a bath. I cook dinner for my family many nights and I almost always tuck one or the other of them into bed at night. That’s the key. I work hard but when my family needs me, I’m there. I drive them to play dates across town on Tuesdays. I take them to the doctor when they are sick. When my wife (who is currently at home) wants to chat, I’m around.

My Family

That’s the secret. You’re self employed which means you’re in the drivers seat. There is only one excuse for putting your business ahead of your loved ones and that’s if you care more about the business than the foundation that is supporting you. I stress about work-life balance. I must ask my wife once a week for a performance evaluation as a husband and a father. I’m not paranoid - I just know how far off the rails a relationship can get once a business gets involved.

I will add that your own mental health is a primary consideration though. You can’t divide the pie into half and give half to the business and half to your family. You need your cut at some stage and in a lot of respects, it’s hardest to reward yourself. Spend time with friends. Get out, meet new people.

To wrap up this article, I want to emphasize that I’m not pulling this sentiment out of my ass. I have met several business advisors to successful entrepreneurs that have been similarly vigilant with the CEOs of the companies they invest in. A business built without a social safety net is one that is doomed to fail. So, if you have a consulting practice and you’re wondering why it’s not going well - look to the foundation of your business and make sure that your most important relationships are healthy.

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Aaron “Crooky” Cruikshank is the Principal and Founder of Friuch Consulting. He has written professionally about science and technology for ten years.

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Topics: Business of Consulting |

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